These monthly updates are meant to inform you about Ubud, about living here and making the best of it.  In April the Balinese have Galungan and Kuningan as major religious and traditional events to celebrate.  I guess everybody knows at least about the basic background for the ceremonies, same as Balinese have a general understanding what Christmas is about.

To me it seems as if each year the penjors become more artistic and sophisticated.

’My’ village up in Tegallalang looks absolutely beautiful with each family having their penjor proud in front of their home, transforming the village road into a much photographed  attraction.  There is only one Bali and hey, what a bliss, we are part of it.

However, this month we ’Bule’s may also have been affected by April fool’s day.  

April fools day is a Western Countries century-old tradition, which is in Bali largely unknown yet, meaning we Expat’s are reasonably safe on this day from having the rug pulled away from under our feet. 

Still, – think about this-

Do you realize that with your own tongue you cannot touch at the same time your upper and lower lip?  

Chances are you just tried, right?  (Although you sure knew that you can).  Later more on the subject of feeling a bit foolish  :o )

Before we give up reasoning and go into silly-mode,
there is something interesting happening, which you should hear about. No, - not just interesting, excellent ! A truly remarkable investment opportunity, which, however, requires more than the average loose change in our pocket on the way to the supermarket.  I make this announcement, because here comes an opportunity of the rare kind where one cannot loose. You can even tell a friend about the good living and also earning a passive income without moving a finger, or breaking the bank, all based on the following unforeseen development:

You see, we made a mistake.  I cannot say that I am proud talking about this, but we made a blunder from which you or whoever hears about this can now benefit.

Some time ago UbudProperty invested into a plot of land in Ubud-Sayan.  A quiet and pretty place.  Ricefield  location, but close to Ubud’s attractions and open to south-east from where the fresh ocean breezes come in. Because the location is one of the top spots in Ubud, we said:  “let’s build a residential village here”.  After all, living near the attractive Ubud center, but still in tranquility and safety, is the dream of many.

For this 11-villa project we set up a matching finance plan.

However, times changed and during the process a sellers market became a buyers market.

To cut the story short – quieter demand and more competition in building villa settlements, made it advisable not to continue building the entire project as initially planned.

We decided to change course, sell some of the land and now can offer 5 finished villas for an attractive price, which would sure be the lowest you will ever find for such a nice setting.

Instead of a fully managed village the plots become now properties with individual villas.

The owner can self manage, or appoint a villa management service to avoid taking care of maintenance, marketing for rental clients, etc.

Advertising for the 5 pool villas on special sale goes out in a few days.  Before this, there is  a window of opportunity to act upon this inside information and be first to strike a remarkable deal:

The price we do offer now is USD 149K for the 2 bedroom villas (3 units), USD 199K  for another 2 bedroom villa (1 unit, bigger size, nice view), and USD 265K for a 3 bedroom villa with very nice view. Lease 23 years, extendable by 30 more.

For a quick overview -  UbudProperty is renting out and managing villas at an average of 70 % occupancy!                                                                                                                       Let’s look at the USD 149K villas as an example.

If you rent out that house for USD 110/ day, you’d net about USD 15.840.- per year, expenses for management and tax considered.  (Short term rentals will bring in more).  Taking into account the annual price increases of average 5%, you will generate in time about USD 450.000 - and still have 30 % of the year to use the villa yourself, or rent to friends.

We are also open to talk about flexible payment terms. If you want to find out more, just

call / email our Ibu Asti on  0361-980 880 asti@ubudproperty.com

This could be the best thing to act upon for a long time …                                         

-  End of the useful part  -

Now the fun stuff  -

"A friend has been visiting me in LA from the east coast. She left the morning of April 1 to go back home. When I returned from work that day I noticed she had left her cell phone charger and it was still plugged in. I called her and asked if she had left her charger plugged in. When she said yes, I told her my place had burned down and the fire department said it started where her charger was plugged in. I told her I had no insurance and all my things including my guitars and all my clothes were gone. I let this go on for about a minute before I asked her, ’Do you know what the worst part of this is?’ She said ’no’ choking back the tears. ’That it’s April Fool’s on you.’ She didn’t talk to me for a long time.

One radio station prank took place on April Fool’s Day. They announced that the phone company would be cleaning the dirt out of the phone lines that afternoon. They do this, it seems, by blowing air into the wires in the switching station. The problem is that the dirt comes out of the earpiece and mouthpiece of the telephone and could dirty the rugs or furniture in your house.

Consequently, the phone company asks that the good citizens please get plastic bags and put them over the handsets of the telephones to protect their belongings.
Stores reported a run on plastic bags.

An ad:

Yes, you too can look like the hugely popular leader of North Korea for just $ 19.99. You get a bowl, clippers and a comb for your money and the rest is easy. "Just place the included bamboo bowl over your head and then use the trimmers to shave around it. Apply some thick syrupy gel (or spit) to your hair and then part in the centre with the comb."

In one of the last April issues  "National Geographic announced “to Stop Publishing Nude Animal Pictures" and added:  "Our media will no longer degrade animals by showing photos of them without clothes."

April 1, 2000: The Independent reported that Florida researchers had developed a Viagra-like pill to treat sexually frustrated pets, including hamsters. Veterinarians were said to have greeted the news with derision, but the article pointed out that there are few things as sad as a pet suffering from feelings of sexual inadequacy, noting, "It’s not unknown for a guinea pig to sit in its cage thinking, ’I haven’t had sex for months. Am I so unattractive?’" Owners were instructed to simply grind the pills up and sprinkle them in the pet’s food. Laying some newspaper down on the floor once the pills began to take effect was also advised.

“Lexus introduces Velcro seats”. Drivers must wear a special suit to sit in them: “While all performance cars use seat bolsters to hold a driver in place during aggressive maneuvering, we’re taking it a step further. In this case, the technology we’re employing is actually over 75 years old.

Now, if you yourself are looking for ways to treat someone to a ’silly pill’, what about these ideas -

Find and download a reasonably high-resolution image of a cracked screen. Searching on Google images should give you lots of options, or you could just use the one here. Set the image as a screensaver on their computer, making sure it is set to activate after a short amount of time (30 seconds or so).                                                                                                                 

Do you have a detachable showerhead? Screw it off, pop in a stock cube and leave it for the next one enjoying a shower.

Place a bottle of liquid dish soap into the toilet tank. The next person to flush the toilet will be greeted with an overwhelming amount of bubbles...

Borrow someone’s cell phone and change the language setting to a foreign language.

Replace the dishwashing liquid with vegetable oil. Make sure you are nearby when mum starts to wonder why the soap does not work today.

Finally :  The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.

(Sorry I shouldn’t bring him up again).

Wouldn’t I be a sad figure in property sales, if I did not remind you of looking into the UbudProperty’s website every now and then?  Presently we have a buyers market and receive constantly new properties for sale. Many are nice, some admittedly only ’Ok-la’,

but then there are some real mouth watering pretty properties to be had as well. 

Buyer’s market, a good time to invest.

Hope to see you here again –  Ramon (Sr. Adviser UbudProperty)